Just Venting

by **SisMorphine** » January 27th, 2011, 11:59 am

I don't expect anyone to have answers. I know this is a situation that I have to decide for myself, so this is just a vent.

I've been planning for months my move back out to where I originally went to college to finish my degree. I have been very excited about this whole thing but now the inner turmoil is getting to me.

My mother's cancer is back. From the way that the doctor has made it sound thusfar, this will most likely be a long fight. But what if it isn't? What if this is the end? I can't imagine being 2.5 hours away and missing things if those will be the last "things" that I can have to remember my mother.

I haven't discussed this with my mother yet. I know I should, but I don't want to question her mortality to her face. And frankly I've never felt comfortable discussing emotional things with her. I prefer to deal with them myself so that she doesn't have to bear the burden of my sadness.

As my father told me last night, I HAVE to go to school because I have my whole life ahead of me. And 2.5 hours isn't really that far away. My roommate who will be moving out with me, her father is also currently in a long cancer battle. So we're both in the same boat.

I guess this move really is what I need to do, but MAN this is getting complicated and heart wrenching. Alright, time to dry up the tears before I head up to snow blow my parent's driveway. Don't want Mom to know I've been crying. Thanks for listening to my drivel.

by **madremissy** » January 27th, 2011, 12:10 pm

Sis,
I have a feeling that your mom would agree with your Dad. My mom has told me over and over again how proud she is of me going back to school and doing something for me.
I know how long you have been planning this and the excitement that you have has been helping move on. I am so sorry about your mom and I know that it is a hard decision. I will support you with whatever you decide.
Have fun in the snow.

by **iluvk9** » January 27th, 2011, 1:22 pm

Look Petunia...as a Mom I would want you to GO TO COLLEGE and not give me the stress of thinking you didn't because of me.

I would also want you to talk to me about it, because I would want to talk to YOU about it, but would be afraid for the same reasons YOU are. No one wants to talk about their mortality with their children because we don't want to upset them.

:hug3:

by **PetieMarie22** » January 27th, 2011, 2:21 pm

SisMorphine wrote:And 2.5 hours isn't really that far away.

I live 3.75 hours away from my home town and I wish it was 2.5. Can you go home on the weekends? I know some people who did that in college.

by **DemoDick** » January 28th, 2011, 8:56 am

Could you focus on your studies while your mother was battling cancer? I couldn't. It would be a shame to put all that money and effort into something that you can't give proper attention to.

You need to have a talk with your mother and find out exactly what she's facing.

Demo Dick

by **SisMorphine** » January 28th, 2011, 10:29 am

Yeah I guess I just have to bite the bullet and talk to her. **sigh**

by **TheRedQueen** » January 28th, 2011, 10:31 am

SisMorphine wrote:Yeah I guess I just have to bite the bullet and talk to her. **sigh**

by **TinaMartin** » January 28th, 2011, 10:41 am

I hope things start to improve for you soon. You have had your plate full for more than a while.

Just Venting

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