Decision 2008

Everything that doesn't fit anywhere else!

Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 12:31 pm

cheekymunkee wrote:
aophoto wrote:
pitbullmamaliz wrote:I'm sorry, I must have missed where you were physically threatened?


It was done through PM so no one else would know about it


Well then how in the HELL are we supposed to do anything about that?? We do NOT read other people's pms, we are NOT mind readers and it is PLAINLY stated on this board that if someone is bothering you in pms to let us know & we will deal with it. It is VERY unfair of you to accuse us of doing nothing about a physical threat when we are totally unaware of it. And I am almost 100% sure you did NOT contact staff about it because we, as a whole, discuss situations like that. So IF you reported this pm and I am not aware of it I do apologize. But, if you did not I resent that statement.

Not to mention the fact that what happens is pms is VERY different from what is posted in public. We ALL do & say things in pms we would not on the board, that is the nature of message boards.

ANd there are 5 staff members, if you do not feel comfortable speaking to one you have others to chose from, we are VERY approachable.


Debby, I'm not attacking you, rather noting what wasn't done about a situation, that if it was from one member to another would have resulted in action. The note WAS from a staff member and it was also made known to Michelle. The fact that the rest of you heard about it is even more frightening. I was stating that the abuse of power that was used, and apparently hiding the situation from other staff members is something that should be noted.

Whether or not things said on PMs are different than what one would say on the board is irrelevant when it's a direct threat. It should be unacceptable either way, and now knowing that the rest of the staff weren't notified of another staff member threatening to abuse their power is shocking.
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 12:32 pm

cheekymunkee wrote:
I don't understand why you breaking the rules would matter anyways.


AND I also resent this statement, I not only 'slapped' Demo in this thread but also in pms so do not think nothing was done about it. Demo does not get a free ride because of who his gf is.


I know you did, I'm merely commenting on what it seems like he's able to get away with over and over. It sounds like in the past he has been slapped on the hand. How many slaps does he get?
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Postby cheekymunkee » November 8th, 2008, 12:37 pm

I deleted my comment but I will put it here so that is makes sense what we are talking about. Sorry for any confusion I caused by removing it.

aophoto wrote:
pitbullmamaliz wrote:I'm sorry, I must have missed where you were physically threatened?


It was done through PM so no one else would know about it


Well then how in the HELL are we supposed to do anything about that?? We do NOT read other people's pms, we are NOT mind readers and it is PLAINLY stated on this board that if someone is bothering you in pms to let us know & we will deal with it. It is VERY unfair of you to accuse us of doing nothing about a physical threat when we are totally unaware of it. And I am almost 100% sure you did NOT contact staff about it because we, as a whole, discuss situations like that. So IF you reported this pm and I am not aware of it I do apologize. But, if you did not I resent that statement.

Not to mention the fact that what happens is pms is VERY different from what is posted in public. We ALL do & say things in pms we would not on the board, that is the nature of message boards.

ANd there are 5 staff members, if you do not feel comfortable speaking to one you have others to chose from, we are VERY approachable.
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Postby cheekymunkee » November 8th, 2008, 12:55 pm

Ok, I have been made aware of the situation. Did you REALLY think that was a threat that you should be frightened about? Someone from across the country from you saying they will put a boot up your ass? Really?

As for Demo, when he breaks rules, he is dealt with like everyone else. BUT he seldom breaks rules. It is not against the rules to be argumentative, condescending, frustrating or rude as he can sometimes be. The very few times he has called names or personally attacked someone he is dealt with like everyone else is. We are not a 'ban them all ' forum and to BE banned you have to really screw up. HE has not done that. But do NOT think he is treated any differently because of who he is. Though we are not owners Jen & I have as much power here as Michelle and we don't get to sleep with him so we have nothing to lose if we were to ban him. It is just that he has not done anything ban worthy. I take banning of members VERY seriously because it is something I HATE doing. In fact, if you piss ME Off bad enough for me to want you banned you have REALLY screwed up.

Anyway, this is stupid, like I requested earlier, let's let this drop & get back to the topic at hand.
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 1:07 pm

cheekymunkee wrote:Ok, I have been made aware of the situation. Did you REALLY think that was a threat that you should be frightened about? Someone from across the country from you saying they will put a boot up your ass? Really?

Anyway, this is stupid, like I requested earlier, let's let this drop & get back to the topic at hand.


No, and nor was I scared that anything was actually going to happen, simply because of the poor judgment of the admin. I thought it was unbelievably inappropriate for anyone to say that, especially coming from someone who is supposed to run the board and keep people in line. Though you all are humans and have feelings too, you have a greater duty to this board and the members that are on it to act like admins, like those in power and keep your cool when situations get heated. The threat didn't add anything to the message and was unnecessary. That is my point.

And sure, we can let it go, I just thought I would bring up points that many on here agree with, but no one has stated. Onward with the thread! What else can we talk about on Decision 2008 btw?
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Postby airwalk » November 8th, 2008, 3:18 pm

Good lord..I don't know about anyone else but the last page and half have been...let's just say difficult. Really, if one is going to participate in political discussions, one needs a skin thick enough to stand their ground and tough it out. If everything is going to be taken personally, then it's not a conversation or a discussion it becomes a name calling session..as I'm sure we have all seen.
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Postby DemoDick » November 8th, 2008, 7:11 pm

Why wouldn't I have? Cause you're a cop?


No, because I don't tolerate disrespect and never have. There is a line people don't cross with me (at least in person) and it has nothing to do with what I do for a living. It has to do with who I am and how I conduct myself.

But please, continue to misrepresent yourself. Tell you what, I will voluntarily post my tax returns for the past ten years as well as my those of my parents. You do the same. Then we'll see who's blowing smoke about knowing what it's like to have nothing and having to EARN something for yourself.

Or you could just cry foul again and bitch that the moderators aren't doing their jobs. Your call.

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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 7:23 pm

DemoDick wrote:
Why wouldn't I have? Cause you're a cop?


No, because I don't tolerate disrespect and never have. There is a line people don't cross with me (at least in person) and it has nothing to do with what I do for a living. It has to do with who I am and how I conduct myself.

But please, continue to misrepresent yourself. Tell you what, I will voluntarily post my tax returns for the past ten years as well as my those of my parents. You do the same. Then we'll see who's blowing smoke about knowing what it's like to have nothing and having to EARN something for yourself.

Or you could just cry foul again and bitch that the moderators aren't doing their jobs. Your call.

Demo Dick


So you don't tolerate it? Ok, what would you do? Assault me? I don't get your point about me not saying it to your face. Of course I would, I'm not going to hide my beliefs because you're older, a cop, have guns or cause you won't tolerate it. Period. Next time, if ever, we meet, I'll let you know how I feel.

Misrepresent myself? What am I misrepresenting? Your tax in the past has nothing to do with what this nation has to face now. Me, just like you, and Michelle, and everyone else who's bank account went into the double digits have to do the same thing. You guys did it in the past, I'm doing it now. That's the end result.

I'm "sorry" I'm actually challenging you and them for once on this forum. It seems as though you of all people would be the kind to challenge authority, maybe I'm wrong because you are the authority.
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Postby pitbullmamaliz » November 8th, 2008, 7:25 pm

You're not "challenging" him or anybody on the forum, regardless of how proud it seems to make you feel. You're simply disagreeing. It's happened here before, it will happen again. :|
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 7:26 pm

pitbullmamaliz wrote:You're not "challenging" him or anybody on the forum, regardless of how proud it seems to make you feel. You're simply disagreeing. It's happened here before, it will happen again. :|


You're right, I am disagreeing. I meant challenge as a positive method of furthering conversation and debates.
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Postby DemoDick » November 8th, 2008, 7:35 pm

So you don't tolerate it? Ok, what would you do? Assault me? I don't get your point about me not saying it to your face. Of course I would, I'm not going to hide my beliefs because you're older, a cop, have guns or cause you won't tolerate it. Period. Next time, if ever, we meet, I'll let you know how I feel.


LOL. I'll bet you will. Were your hands shaking when you wrote that? I bet they were. :)

Misrepresent myself? What am I misrepresenting? Your tax in the past has nothing to do with what this nation has to face now. Me, just like you, and Michelle, and everyone else who's bank account went into the double digits have to do the same thing. You guys did it in the past, I'm doing it now. That's the end result.


You are misrepresenting that you are a struggling college graduate instead of a child of privilege. I didn't have rich parents to bail me out, neither did Michelle. Sorry, you will NEVER have to face the difficulties we did. Still waiting on those tax returns...

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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 7:41 pm

DemoDick wrote:LOL. I'll bet you will. Were your hands shaking when you wrote that? I bet they were. :)


Nope! sorry to disappoint you patrick

You are misrepresenting that you are a struggling college graduate instead of a child of privilege. I didn't have rich parents to bail me out, neither did Michelle. Sorry, you will NEVER have to face the difficulties we did. Still waiting on those tax returns...

Demo Dick


Like I said, I wasn't a struggling college student cause my parents worked my ass off so I didn't have to live through that like they did. I don't really see anything wrong with that, and that's what many people on here are doing for their kids. Am I wrong?

Maybe you guys have to struggle through school and I didn't, but I'm still almost in double digits in my bank account, so I don't know how you can discount that I'm not there.
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Postby BullyLady » November 8th, 2008, 8:18 pm

aophoto wrote:Like I said, I wasn't a struggling college student cause my parents worked my ass off so I didn't have to live through that like they did. I don't really see anything wrong with that, and that's what many people on here are doing for their kids. Am I wrong?


I'm going to throw in on this subject. People like us (I am a struggling college student, an actual one, grew up pretty poor and am trying desperately to break the cycle) get really offended when people of privelege try to "slum it" or "relate" to those of us who are less priveleged. I'm not saying you will never feel money strain, you may in fact be feeling it right this very moment, but you will NEVER feel the strain that I and many others on this board have. I am literally one paycheck away from loosing my house, if I were to have a catastrophe my home would go into foreclosure, because my parents can't bail me out. And my savings account is still depleted from a major accident I had last year, so I would literally loose everything and have to move back home with my husband, two dogs, and two cats. And no, there is nothing wrong with the fact that you grew up priveleged, good on your for having a less stressful life than I do, but do not try to act like you know what it's like to be poor, because you do not.
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 8:23 pm

BullyLady wrote:I'm going to throw in on this subject. People like us (I am a struggling college student, an actual one, grew up pretty poor and am trying desperately to break the cycle) get really offended when people of privelege try to "slum it" or "relate" to those of us who are less priveleged. I'm not saying you will never feel money strain, you may in fact be feeling it right this very moment, but you will NEVER feel the strain that I and many others on this board have. I am literally one paycheck away from loosing my house, if I were to have a catastrophe my home would go into foreclosure, because my parents can't bail me out. And my savings account is still depleted from a major accident I had last year, so I would literally loose everything and have to move back home with my husband, two dogs, and two cats. And no, there is nothing wrong with the fact that you grew up priveleged, good on your for having a less stressful life than I do, but do not try to act like you know what it's like to be poor, because you do not.


I applaud you, and everyone else that had to do this. I'm not discounting what you have accomplished, not one bit. I am simply relating to the fact that I'm in a financial strain now and that's all. I sincerely hope nothing happens to you or anyone else for that matter, and that you continue to make it and prosper in the future. I'm not relating to that at all. I'm relating to having double digit funds in the bank. that is all, that's my point and nothing else.

Like I said, congratulations for what you've managed to do, and others as well.
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Postby DemoDick » November 8th, 2008, 9:14 pm

I applaud you, and everyone else that had to do this. I'm not discounting what you have accomplished, not one bit. I am simply relating to the fact that I'm in a financial strain now and that's all.


This is what you can't or won't understand. AS SOMEONE WHO HAS WEALTHY PARENTS TO FALL BACK ON YOU WILL NEVER KNOW TRUE FINANCIAL STRAIN.

You will never look at empty cupboards and wish you could afford to eat. You will never have to face the decision of whether to not pay the power bill and freeze or keep your phone line on so that prospective employers can call you back regarding job applications. You will never know what it's like to siphon gas out of your lawn mower to put in your car so you can drive to job interviews. You will never have to make the decision to feed your kids instead of yourself. You will never have to stuff your kid's stockings with oranges and apples instead of toys at Christmas.

I, as well as many others here, have faced or are facing those same decisions now. THAT is why we resent you pretending to know what it's like to deal with REAL financial desperation. But you will never truly understand what it's like to go through that. Please stop embarassing yourself by pretending to.

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Postby BullyLady » November 8th, 2008, 9:17 pm

DemoDick wrote:Please stop embarassing yourself by pretending to.


+1 And just to be clear, aophoto, I for one read your responding post as slightly condescending. Possibly just because it's a sensitive subject, but it felt like you were patting me on the head and giving me a "good girl".
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 9:30 pm

DemoDick wrote:=This is what you can't or won't understand. AS SOMEONE WHO HAS WEALTHY PARENTS TO FALL BACK ON YOU WILL NEVER KNOW TRUE FINANCIAL STRAIN.

You will never look at empty cupboards and wish you could afford to eat. You will never have to face the decision of whether to not pay the power bill and freeze or keep your phone line on so that prospective employers can call you back regarding job applications. You will never know what it's like to siphon gas out of your lawn mower to put in your car so you can drive to job interviews. You will never have to make the decision to feed your kids instead of yourself. You will never have to stuff your kid's stockings with oranges and apples instead of toys at Christmas.

I, as well as many others here, have faced or are facing those same decisions now. THAT is why we resent you pretending to know what it's like to deal with REAL financial desperation. But you will never truly understand what it's like to go through that. Please stop embarassing yourself by pretending to.

Demo Dick


I'm not going to bother debating with you guys anymore cause it's pointless, I'm not going to change my view and you're not either. I'm just stating that I'm not , nor my family, is the happy little millionaire dream come true like you paint us out to be. This "discussion" has turned from an honest debate of topics to misrepresentation of me and my family. It started with talking about making donations, and despite what my parents have, I'm not here to donate their money to organizations that I want to contribute to, that's what it comes down to. The reason my family has what it does is because of my grandparents working their asses off, poor as hell and in a similar situation to what some of you are enduring. So keep doing what you're doing to get by, build your fortune, pass it onto your kids if you have it and let them lead a happy life. It's what everyone wants for their kids, period. My parents found a way to make it and make sure i didn't have to do what they did to get by in college, bottom line.

+1 And just to be clear, aophoto, I for one read your responding post as slightly condescending. Possibly just because it's a sensitive subject, but it felt like you were patting me on the head and giving me a "good girl".


i'm sorry you read it that way but that was not the intention at all. i'm in all honestly commending you and others for what you are and they might have gone through. I'm not all evil and everything I type isn't condescending, cynical or sarcastic.
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Postby cheekymunkee » November 8th, 2008, 9:40 pm

BullyLady wrote:
aophoto wrote:Like I said, I wasn't a struggling college student cause my parents worked my ass off so I didn't have to live through that like they did. I don't really see anything wrong with that, and that's what many people on here are doing for their kids. Am I wrong?


I'm going to throw in on this subject. People like us (I am a struggling college student, an actual one, grew up pretty poor and am trying desperately to break the cycle) get really offended when people of privelege try to "slum it" or "relate" to those of us who are less priveleged. I'm not saying you will never feel money strain, you may in fact be feeling it right this very moment, but you will NEVER feel the strain that I and many others on this board have. I am literally one paycheck away from loosing my house, if I were to have a catastrophe my home would go into foreclosure, because my parents can't bail me out. And my savings account is still depleted from a major accident I had last year, so I would literally loose everything and have to move back home with my husband, two dogs, and two cats. And no, there is nothing wrong with the fact that you grew up priveleged, good on your for having a less stressful life than I do, but do not try to act like you know what it's like to be poor, because you do not.


Not to mention years & years of paying back student loans because your parents were not fortunate enough to be able to pay cash for your education. I wish you better times little one. Hold on, they will come.

And AO, no one is saying coming from privilege is a bad thing, it isn't. I a very happy that your family was able to provide well for you. Just dont pretend to know what people like BL & others have to go through while your parents were able to pay for your VERY expensive education. I had to pawn my dyson the other day for gas money until payday. Have you ever had to do that? Would you ever have to do that? That my friend, is the difference
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Postby pitbullmamaliz » November 8th, 2008, 9:58 pm

I'm paying nearly $400 a month for my student loans. I should be done with that in about, oh, 30 years. For nearly a year I wouldn't answer my phone because I had creditors calling me. They were calling my family too. That's embarrassing, you know. Oh wait, no, you don't know. I lived off Ramen while Inara kept eating excellent food. I had to pick and choose which utility bill to pay each month, rotating them so that they wouldn't get shut off. They still occasionally did. The night I had to pay nearly $200 to euthanize my beloved cat of 16 years, my electricity had been shut off. That was a great freaking night. My mom desperately wanted to come up and support me about the loss of my cat, but I had to say no because I was too humiliated and didn't want her to know I had no power. I was getting migraines and heartburn on a daily basis from stress, not sleeping, and crying a lot. It sucked.

Fortunately now due to a couple of raises at work and a part-time job I had to take on for a while, I am on steady ground. In 6 or 7 months my student loans will be out of default. I don't have creditors calling. I'm happy again and this year I'll actually be able to buy Christmas presents for my family. My credit will be screwed up for years, but I'm dealing with it. And you know, it's an amazing feeling knowing that I did it on my own. An amazing feeling. And like the others who have posted here, I will never have sympathy for people whose parents paid their way through college and yet they still don't have money. You're extremely fortunate that you had that privilege. Extremely. And I'm not trying to be sarcastic there. Just keep in mind that a lot of us have had to work a lot harder than you to get where we are now, which is barely making it. It's just called real life. :|

Also, I know it's been several (dozen) posts since you stated this, but I am really irked by your post about how you're aspiring to be a well-known photographer and therefore you needed the best equipment. Do you think Michelle is just aspiring to be a mediocre photographer? Of course not, no matter what you do you should aspire to be the best. However, most people have to work their way up to the best equipment - they start with what they can afford and save for better. So please don't insinuate that Michelle is not a good photographer or aspiring to be one (as she is extremely talented) just because her camera has noise in low light (and yes, I know what that means). It's condescending, and it annoys me as she is my friend. So I'll say something even if she doesn't.
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Postby aophoto » November 8th, 2008, 10:14 pm

cheekymunkee wrote:And AO, no one is saying coming from privilege is a bad thing, it isn't. I a very happy that your family was able to provide well for you. Just dont pretend to know what people like BL & others have to go through while your parents were able to pay for your VERY expensive education. I had to pawn my dyson the other day for gas money until payday. Have you ever had to do that? Would you ever have to do that? That my friend, is the difference


I never pretended to be like what some of you went through. Demo threw those words out there. I merely stated that I didn't have enough money to donate to people that I thought needed it. Again, you guys are right, I didn't have to go through college paycheck by paycheck, and I'm glad I didn't. I've heard too many horror stories about having to pay off student loans. Again, to make my point clear, I NEVER pretended to go through college paycheck to paycheck. I NEVER pretended anything of the sort. I stated:

Do you want to see a screenshot of my bank account... 88 bucks in savings and 100 in checking. I really don't think i'm at a point where I can donate to a lot of people, although thanks to you guys and many of your conservative views I did make a decent donation to Barack Obama's campaign, just to be sure to help.


There is no mention of college or anything otherwise. I'm merely talking about donating to people that need it. Again from my other post, I'm NOT going to give away my parents money. If they feel they need to donate, they can do it for themselves.

Additionally, I donated to the Obama campaign instead of underprivileged families because if he was elected, I believe that his plans would be a better solution for them. So compare my $160 donation directly to them vs. the millions that would go to them if he was elected. I weighed out this option. I have yet to pawn something off and hope that I never have to.

Liz, I'm glad you made it through your tough time and are on your feet now. However, simply because I haven't had the years of experience that you have doesn't discount my argument.

Also, I know it's been several (dozen) posts since you stated this, but I am really irked by your post about how you're aspiring to be a well-known photographer and therefore you needed the best equipment. Do you think Michelle is just aspiring to be a mediocre photographer? Of course not, no matter what you do you should aspire to be the best. However, most people have to work their way up to the best equipment - they start with what they can afford and save for better. So please don't insinuate that Michelle is not a good photographer or aspiring to be one (as she is extremely talented) just because her camera has noise in low light (and yes, I know what that means). It's condescending, and it annoys me as she is my friend. So I'll say something even if she doesn't.


And yes, I could have gotten worse equipment, but I worked the entire previous summer at a newspaper, building my portfolio and earning money to be able to buy what I did. You're right, I could have gotten a lesser camera, but image quality in my line of work is essential, it's crucial, its the difference between a job and unemployment. If you have the opportunity to get a new computer or an old, outdated one, you're going to get the new one (financial aspect aside, considering I addressed this earlier). Also, you're right, Michelle does have some good work, but she has a FT job, and photography has been a small side business and serious hobby for her. Of course no one aspires to be mediocre, but she has a full time job in another field. Photography IS my profession and poor image quality, or not being able to capture a moment because your shutter speed is 1/15 of a second (extremely slow to those who aren't photo geeky like i) is unacceptable.

I did a story at DOTCORNY a while back, and I wasn't able to get virtually any good images because my camera's low light was crappy. My teacher told me it was unacceptable, as would any editor or serious photographer. That story sucked, I'll be the first to admit it, and it was because I was limited by equipment (note, it was multimedia and the audio was stunning). I told myself that day that if I was able to get the equipment needed to succeed, and that I was going to be able to perform at my highest level, without technology holding me back, then I was going to do it. I'd liken it to being a cop, but not having a car, only a golf cart while criminals had ferrari's. It would be extremely difficult, if not almost impossible, to succeed at your job. That's why I made the investment I did.
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